Butterflies and Hurricanes

Today was a glorious morning. I woke up, and when I drew my curtains apart, I was greeted by a day that most people would call ‘gloomy.’ The sky was overcast with puffy, grey clouds. It was drizzling, breezy and chilly. You have to understand that in India, we usually don’t prefer the sun. And by India, I mean people who have lived most of their lives in a hot, dry and sultry city. And by we, I mean me.

So, unlike most mornings, when my “beautiful morning” moments are followed by anger, exasperation and disappointment at the infrastructural wonder that is Whitefield, I didn’t let anything get to me. I plugged my earphones deep inside my ears, played some Tame Impala, and bounced all the way to the bus-stop. I didn’t mind the heaps of garbage right beside the bus-stop. I didn’t mind the cows roaming willy-nilly all over the streets, better adept at crossing roads than us mere mortals. I didn’t even mind the stink that emanates from the chicken shop that makes me feel sick and hold my breath. I didn’t mind the dust, I didn’t mind the broken pieces of tar and stone that pretend to be roads, I didn’t mind the honking. I didn’t mind any of it. I was looking at a point in the distance and just walking, with a ‘zen’ expression on my face. Most days these things drive me insane and compel me to spew a flurry of profanities under my breath. But not today, no way. Today, I was the master of my mood.

While I was working in one of the empty conference rooms with those huge glass windows, I noticed hordes and hordes of dragonflies hovering over the palm trees. The weather was so heart-breakingly beautiful and I wanted to run out so bad. It reminded me of this:

It also reminded me of our macro photography assignments in college on our beautiful hill, where all we had to do for the next two hours was shoot things. Birds, butterflies, flowers, leaves, frogs, insects, stones. I can’t believe I ever cribbed about it. I would give anything to do that now. Anything. My favourite subject used to be the dragonfly. Its wings used to shine in the sun magnificently. Sigh.

So guess what? I’m going to turn 25. Yep, it’s gonna happen, in exactly a month. You know how I start freaking about my birthday, right? Well, this year is going to be different. Because this year, I have an unbelievably amazing friend who told me that I need to get out of the whole age thing. Because it doesn’t matter whether I’m 25 or 65, it’s the spirit with which you live your life. So why am I making such a big deal out of growing up? Maybe because as soon you’re born in India, your entire life is scheduled and earmarked for you. There’s a time to graduate, a time to get married, a ‘safe time’ to have babies. So we feel as if our time is running out. Deadlines, everywhere.

Anyway, can I tell you something exciting? I’m going for my first work trip! I’m travelling to Mumbai on the 13^th, and going to cover a client’s event. It’s a pretty big deal, and I’m really excited that my bosses gave me this opportunity. Somehow, I feel that if I manage to do this successfully, and prove myself, I won’t mind turning 25 in the least bit. I’d feel that I deserve to be that old. So, it’ll be my first solo ‘business trip’, where I’ll have ‘corporate meals’ in my flight, stay in fancy hotels, and cover fancier events and pretend to be all cultured and smart. I can’t wait! I’m actually a little nervous about it, because I’ve never done this alone. But man, oh man, oh man, it’ll be a whole new experience for me. Wow, I’m all grown up, aren’t I? It’s funny how things like this can give you a sense of importance and relevance. But I feel like I really need this right now. I can do it. I can.

For the past few months, I have been reading a lot and watching movies. It’s oddly satisfying. Sometimes the only thing I feel like doing on the weekends is eat, curl up on the bed and read, fall asleep, get up and repeat the entire exercise. I read The Martian, Of Mice and Men and The Road, all in the last one month. Awesome, right?

I’ve finally started watching Lost. Also watched Mr. Robot. When it gets really crazy at work, I long to get back to my room, and just be with myself. Did I tell you I shifted into this brilliant little room in my apartment that has a bunk bed? I mean, who gets to sleep in a bunk bed when they’re turning twenty-five? It also has the cutest study table right next to the window, bookshelves and drawers and lots of wardrobe space! It’s a dream. I can’t believe I actually found a space in the world I love so much. I don’t know how I’ll ever shift out. I’m going to do some super cool DIY stuff to make it cozier. I’ll share the pictures here, soon 🙂

Well, it’s almost time for sunrise and I have to get up for an eight-thirty call. 8:30 AM. On a Saturday morning. One of those things that comes with feeling all adult-y and relevant. Oh, well. I better get some sleep. Have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow. I hope everything goes well. Because sometimes it doesn’t. ‘Cause you know, life has a habit of getting in the way of happy endings.

Before I go, can I tell you something else? I’m going to meet Chee in Mumbai.

It’s going to be one hell of a week 🙂

P.S. Have you heard Fake Plastic Trees by Radiohead? 🙂

P.P.S Click here to check out what I’d written when I had turned twenty 😛 It’s been FIVE YEARS!